Tag: women empowerment

20-Somethings Are Friends, Not Foes

Published on by The April Diaries1 Comment

I recalled watching the 20-somethings episode of Sex and The City, for the first time, in my twenties. I remember specifically because I was in my early twenties as an editorial intern at Rhode Island’s premier magazine. As a soon-to-be-minted 28-year-old, I’m learning what my editors must’ve felt like when they mentored me!

Today, I want to dive into a topic that’s close to my heart: the friendship (yes, friendship!) between 20-something women and their older counterparts. Too often, societal narratives pit us against each other, but let’s break that mold and embrace the truth—we can be allies, mentors, and, most importantly, friends.

Shattering the Myth

First off, let’s tackle the elephant in the room—the myth that younger and older women are inherently at odds. You know the stereotype: the young, ambitious woman is out to steal the thunder of the seasoned, experienced woman. This is not only outdated but also incredibly untrue.

Mutual Respect and Admiration

The reality is that 20-something women often look up to their older peers. We admire your wisdom, your experiences, and the way you’ve navigated life’s twists and turns. There’s so much to learn from someone who has been through the trenches and come out stronger. On the flip side, many older women find inspiration in the fresh perspectives and fearless energy of younger women. It’s a beautiful exchange of ideas and encouragement.

Mentorship Over Competition

Instead of seeing each other as competition, imagine the possibilities when we embrace mentorship. Older women have a treasure trove of knowledge about careers, relationships, and self-care. Sharing these insights can be incredibly empowering for younger women just starting their journey. Meanwhile, younger women can offer a fresh take on new technologies, social media trends, and innovative thinking that can be beneficial to their older friends.

Building Each Other Up

In a world that often tries to tear women down, supporting each other is revolutionary. When we stand together, we create a network of strength. Whether it’s celebrating each other’s achievements or providing a shoulder to cry on, our support system grows stronger with each new connection.

Common Ground

Let’s not forget the countless interests we share. From books and movies to fashion and fitness, there’s plenty of common ground to bond over. Maybe you both love trying out new recipes, or perhaps you’re both passionate about traveling. Finding these shared interests is a wonderful way to build lasting friendships.

Real-Life Stories

To put it in perspective, let’s hear from a few real-life duos:

Jane (52) and Emily (27): “Emily is like the daughter I never had. We met at a book club and hit it off immediately. She’s taught me about the latest social media trends, and I’ve shared my experiences in navigating career challenges. We’ve become each other’s cheerleaders, and it’s such a fulfilling friendship.”

Lisa (46) and Rachel (24): “Lisa and I work together, and what started as a professional relationship has blossomed into a true friendship. She’s been my mentor, guiding me through my early career stages. In return, I’ve helped her with modern digital tools. Our bond is built on mutual respect and genuine care for each other’s growth.”

Tips for Building Intergenerational Friendships

  1. Be Open-Minded: Don’t let age be a barrier. Be open to friendships with women of all ages.
  2. Share Experiences: Swap stories and experiences. You’ll be amazed at what you can learn from each other.
  3. Offer Support: Be there for each other in times of need, and celebrate each other’s successes.
  4. Embrace Differences: Recognize that different perspectives can enrich your life.

Final Thoughts

Let’s change the narrative and celebrate the friendships that transcend age. 20-something women and their older counterparts are not foes—they are sisters, allies, and friends. Together, we can build a stronger, more supportive community that uplifts women of all generations.

So here’s to us—older, younger, and everyone in between. Let’s be each other’s greatest allies and create a world where women support women, no matter their age.

What’s your experience with intergenerational friendships? Share your stories in the comments below—we’d love to hear from you!

MORE LIKE THIS: I Started Watching ‘Sex And The City’ Again From Season 1 and This Is What I Noticed Is Different In Modern Times, Understanding the Link Between Chronic Fatigue and Hormones; Unpacking the box and taking out the itchy, fuzzy blanket of childhood; Things You Will Learn In College, As Told By A Second Semester Senior; What I wish I knew before starting college

I Started Watching ‘Sex And The City’ Again From Season 1 and This Is What I Noticed Is Different In Modern Times

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Since its debut in the late 1990s, “Sex and the City” has left an indelible mark on popular culture with its portrayal of four women navigating relationships, careers, and life in New York City. However, revisiting the series today prompts a reflection on how societal norms and values have shifted, significantly altering the landscape of relationships and representation in media.

One notable difference between “Sex and the City” and modern times is the evolving emphasis on representation and diversity. Critics have pointed out the show’s lack of racial diversity and narrow focus on a specific demographic of women. In contrast, contemporary media prioritizes inclusivity, with a push for diverse casts that reflect a broader range of experiences and backgrounds, acknowledging the importance of intersectionality.

Another key distinction lies in the impact of social and technological changes. When “Sex and the City” first aired, smartphones and social media were not yet ubiquitous. Today, technology plays a central role in dating and relationships, influencing how people connect, communicate, and navigate intimacy.

The shifting landscape of gender roles and feminism is also evident. While “Sex and the City” celebrated independent, career-driven women, today’s narratives delve deeper into issues of intersectional feminism, gender equality, and inclusivity, reflecting a more nuanced understanding of women’s experiences and challenges.

Attitudes towards sexuality have evolved as well. “Sex and the City” was groundbreaking for its frank discussions about sex and relationships. However, contemporary media embraces a broader spectrum of sexual orientations and identities, fostering greater acceptance and representation.

Fashion and lifestyle choices depicted in “Sex and the City” reflected a specific era of luxury and materialism. Today, there’s a broader range of styles celebrated in popular culture, with increasing emphasis on sustainability and ethical consumption.

Critically, modern narratives engage with societal issues more explicitly. While “Sex and the City” was criticized for glamorizing consumerism, contemporary media often critiques materialism and explores its impact on personal well-being and society at large.

In conclusion, revisiting “Sex and the City” in the context of modern times highlights the profound shifts in societal norms, values, and perspectives on relationships. While the show remains iconic for its era, contemporary media reflects a more diverse, inclusive, and socially conscious landscape, reflecting the ongoing evolution of culture and attitudes towards love, sex, and urban life. As we continue to progress, it’s essential to embrace these changes and celebrate media that resonates with the rich tapestry of human experiences in today’s world.

10 Dorothy Day Quotes For Business Owners and Entrepreneurs

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I know I’ve been MIA on the blog recently and I am sorrrryyyy. But I have been working and doing some rearrangements and rebranding to my business, “Brownies For Breakfast.” I’ve come to the realization that I love a good cup of coffee and, of course, writing. I used to think of writing as something that made me sad. But in fact, storytelling is my favorite thing to do, especially on social media. Why not combine the two!? It’s a sad fact of life when you’ve painted over a perfectly carved statue in the raw. Feel free to quote me on that.

I came across an Instagram post that had the caption of a Dorothy Day quote. I remember when I tried to start a “Dorothy Day Collective” on my former alma mater’s campus. Years later, after I transferred, I talked to someone and she said “perhaps people didn’t understand what it was you were doing.” Oddly enough, Dorothy Day had the same experience when she founded the Catholic Worker Movement.

With my business and writing on the brain recently, nonetheless Dorothy Day, I compiled a list of Dorothy Day quotes that hopefully will inspire my fellow entrepreneurs to keep going.

  1. “The greatest challenge of the day is: how to bring about a revolution of the heart, a revolution which has to start with each one of us?”
  2. “We have all known the long loneliness and we have learned that the only solution is love and that love comes with community.”
  3. “Don’t worry about being effective. Just concentrate on being faithful to the truth.”
  4. “Our problems stem from our acceptance of this filthy, rotten system.”
  5. “There is plenty to do, for each one of us, working on our own hearts, changing our own attitudes, in our own neighborhoods.”
  6. “I do not know how to love God except by loving the poor. I do not know how to serve God except by serving the poor…. Here, within this great city of nine million people, we must, in this neighborhood, on this street, in this parish, regain a sense of community which is the basis for peace in the world.”
  7. “Turn off your radio. Put away your daily paper. Read one review of events a week and spend some time reading good books. They tell too of days of striving and of strife. They are of other centuries and also of our own. They make us realize that all times are perilous, that men live in a dangerous world, in peril constantly of losing or maiming soul and body. We get some sense of perspective reading such books. Renewed courage and faith and even joy to live.”
  8. “The biggest mistake sometimes is to play things very safe in this life and end up being moral failures.”
  9. “You can spend your time agonizing or organizing.”
  10. “You will know your vocation by the joy that it brings you. You will know. You will know when it’s right.”

Fight For Your Dreams, Fight The Patriarchy, And Support One Another In The Process

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Every Academy Award show, year after year, there are speeches that may as well go down in history, especially this past award show. I would have liked to compile a “top ten best dressed: Oscars 2019,” but there is more that needs to be said.

Can we all just be in awe of the fact that Lady Gaga is halfway towards being an EGOT (Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, and Tony winner)!? That’s right, for those who missed it, Lady Gaga won an Oscar for “Best Original Song.” Everyone around me questioned Lady Gaga when I was growing up, but I’ve always liked her for being different. I read magazines that reported, “oh, she just likes the attention.” No. She embodies theater and performance. Don’t get me wrong, we’re supposed to question everything in life, and no one can exactly stop anyone for having opinions. But one thing is true is that opinions should be backed up by fact and not plain prejudice and self-importance.

Moreover, this part of her acceptance speech struck a chord of truth in me:

“If you have a dream, fight for it. It’s not about how many times you get rejected or you fall down or get beaten up. It’s about how many times you stand, are brave and keep on going.”

Oftentimes, I find myself questioning (there’s that word again!) my future based on what people say to me. Granted, especially if you’re in the arts, you’re going to have critics. I have/had many critics, no matter what the situation. But I’ve kept on going. I auditioned for dance theatre last month, and auditioned for two dances for the dance club and didn’t get into either one of them. But it was no belittlement of my talent because I know that I put in the effort and I tried. They even took the time to acknowledge how much effort I put in. I hated that people tried to talk me down from being “too passionate” when dancing. In fact, having passion while dancing is a good thing.

I then saw this Facebook post, post-victory and it was a picture of Gaga with a quote from her above it that read:

“I had a boyfriend who told me I’d never succeed, never be nominated for a grammy, never have a hit and hoped I’d fail. I said to him ‘someday, someday when we’re not together anymore, you won’t be able to order a cup of coffee at the fucking deli without hearing or seeing me.”

Did I mention some idiot she went to college with made a Facebook group titled, “Stefani Germanotta, you will never be famous?”

I know both those feelings all too well — to have people close to me not supporting me and, instead, hoping that I’d fail or do less. And I do recall being added to a random-ass Facebook group as a joke by people I didn’t even know in eighth grade. Who knows? There were probably Facebook groups or group chats solely made to diss me. Again, I don’t know, and I never will.

And my point? What you say will come back to unapologetically bite you. But I’m not here to give you karmic facts.

Also, today also happens to be International Women’s Day — one of my favorite days of the year! No, really, it is. I’m also very excited to announce that I will be returning to RWU next year as VICE PRESIDENT, for the second year in a row, of the Women’s Collective for Violence Prevention and Victim Empowerment!!! I remember, at my previous college, I tried to start a women’s empowerment group, and to this day, I feel like I failed my interested peers because of the illnesses that overcame my life that semester. When I first announced it to my (then) class group on Facebook, it was mocked. I was often labeled a “third-wave feminist,” but that was just one source of ridicule on my ever-growing feminism. But look at me now! I could go completely off-topic if I wanted to, but I shall not.

But my point is? Instead of tearing each other down, support one another and build each other up. Many people have tweeted this, so much that it should just be a rule of thumb, at this point. Envy and hatred are never in style, and I’m not just saying that because I’m a fashion blogger (see what I did there?) It’s true, no matter what gender you are. Don’t write-off someone’s vision as “stupid” or something that should be “held off,” but a possibility. Who knows? That vision could be a good idea to others.

 

Cheers To Two Years Of This Blog

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First of all, HAPPY TWO YEARS TO THIS BLOG! Remember when it used to be “Redheaded Ambition?” I do, too. Second, thank you so much to the readers who have been with me throughout this journey of expression. Thank you to my parents (especially my mom) for giving me this idea, and especially to those who encouraged me to keep writing.

I remember when I first started this blog, I was not in a good place in my life. But this was a point where I was starting to become my own person and not give a f**k about what people would think about me/my decisions, and I’ll be honest, some decisions were better than others (e.g. dying my hair a dark brown — yikes!) Yet again, we are human.

I’m at a much better place in my life right now and am truly enjoying the work I’m doing. I also remember when writing this blog, I was trying to be THE boss-ass bitch by doing everything I could’ve ever done with my time. I remember looking at a photo of myself wearing a Madrid baseball cap, green plaid scarf, typical black leggings look with Hunter Boots holding a pumpkin spice latte from Dunkin Donuts sticking my tongue out, and I couldn’t help but think: “I’m in a new place (literally), with a new mindset, with the same deep-red nail polish and same coffee obsession.”

I remember writing The Art of Communication and thinking about how angry I was while initially writing it that summer. Then came the day I started this blog and I was actually ready to put it out there.

Also, while reflecting, I’m going to be honest (as always.) I went against what I preached in THE FASHION DIARIES: Wedding Attire And Getting Real About Love and tried a dating app (I’m not going to say which one.) My advice after the ordeal I went through this past month? Don’t do it. Never would I ever have thought I’d be the one to break things off with a guy, but my other piece of advice is KNOW.  YOUR. WORTH. The reason why I didn’t post this on time was that of this guy who took advantage of my precious time. It’s actually super funny because whenever I’m in my last full year at a school, I have “things” with guys. Moreover, my job as a blogger/influencer/woman is to empower other young women (and even men) that may be going through what I have gone through.

Moral of the story: thank u, next (best song EVER.)

Another funny thing? I was going through something like this two years ago when starting this blog (different circumstances, of course.) I always compare myself to Carrie Bradshaw, but in this case, I feel like Miranda because she, like the rest of the “quad,” are powerful women. But my favorite thing about Miranda is that she never accepted anything less than she deserved.

giphy

And going off of that gif, she never apologized for her success. 💪 One more thing before I wrap up this blog post is that she has supportive friends. And I’m beyond thankful for each and every one of my friends who has supported me throughout all areas of my life.

I love you all, and from now on, I’m dedicating myself to empowerment and, of course, writing!

xoxo

April 💋❤

 

 

Empower Not Tower

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“A bully tries to tower, but really has no power.” –  Aly & AJ

Have you ever been told you’re “too much?” “Overly emotional?” Or even worse, “not good enough?” For me: yes, yes, and yes.

Bullying has, unfortunately, become an unnecessary epidemic plaguing our society. But is society the bully? I know, I’m getting a little too deep and poetic here, but this is the thing: IT’S WHO I AM.

I saw a tweet posted by one of my fellow Instagramming Fashionistas. It read:

When someone you trust tells you ‘who you are,’ you tend to believe what they say. It’s important to understand you know yourself better than anyone else does, and what someone else says about you doesn’t define who you are — no matter how important that person is to your life. – @OfficialBrit.

Simply “brushing it off,” is something that I don’t think anyone can do easily — especially not me! Having spent the majority of my school years being bullied by adults, people my age, and even people younger than me, I eventually learned to “brush off the hate” and live my own life without worrying about what people thought of me, even though there was a point in my life I tried so hard to be ‘perfect.’ In fact, whenever I have one of my “episodes,” I repeat to myself, “I try so hard to be the perfect daughter, friend, girlfriend [that is, when I am in a relationship] and no one appreciates my efforts!” But in reality, that’s my anxiety kicking into full swing.

But what you have to realize that, and yes, this is another quote from HelloKaty:

“Nothing hurts unless you let it!”

I’m literally pulling quotes out of my butt, and I’m not apologizing for it!

That’s another problem: we always have to feel like we’re “sorry” for who we are when really, you just have to OWN. IT. We even apologize for the little things that we do that people might think are annoying, even when they’re not considered “annoying.” This reminds me of an old, but still relevant Selena Gomez song.

On that note, and this goes for guys, too: if you choose to make fun of someone for not doing/having something, take a step back because you’re no better than them. Empower, not tower. 

Did I ever welcome you all to my new series, by the way?

If I don’t do/have something it’s either that I choose not to, or simply because I don’t have control over it!

Moral of the story, when someone tries to tear you down, or if they’re just jealous, know this: don’t let that person’s harsh/passive-aggressive words or actions affect you. I know that’s easier said than done, but in the end, the haters lose and you’re the winner in your own life. But we’re not children, anymore. No one is keeping “tallies.” I once did an art project titled “Life is a game, but in order to play it, you need to find yourself first.” It’s basically about staying true to yourself throughout this “game” we call life. And I use that term very loosely, and so should you, even if you are a competitive person.